sunday, nov 5, 2000
am i hot or not
on a scale of one to ten
i've got the perfect shot for them...
posted by quonsar at 9:23 pm
whatbadgerseat.com
mentioned by lisa on the simpsons tonight
fox is sly enough to snap these domains up before the episodes air. remember www.peggysfeet.com from 'king of the hill'? nowadays it just dumps you on the front page of fox.com.
posted by quonsar at 8:12 pm
spooky space clouds shock scientists
giant skull many times larger than our galaxy
turns out it was just a bit of x-ray emitting gas in the cluster...
posted by quonsar at 8:00 pm
smooth move, casanova
thought lover was two-timing him
"he accused her of seeing another man and insisted on an intimate "physical check" of her private parts"
posted by quonsar at 7:36 pm
dubyas boy's club
skull and bones: white, male, and rich
in case you hadn't guessed, i despise this clown.
posted by quonsar at 5:55 pm
saturday, nov 4, 2000
cat box zen garden
what does your cat do to reduce stress?
posted by quonsar at 11:22 pm
the floozie in the jacuzzi
meeting place, landmark, resting spot, rubbish dump
"o'connell street's most famous bare-breasted woman has been attracting the wrong sort of attention, with people throwing litter at her."
posted by quonsar at 10:53 pm
singing fish scales new heights
big toy producers disconcerted. poor babies.
"marketing experts have been left scratching their heads over the phenomenal success of billy bass"
i don't understand their surprise. look how many hits that inane dancing hamster site got. or mahir. pet rocks, anyone?
posted by quonsar at 10:36 pm
innocent inanimate objects
kill them all, let god sort 'em out
there's this little area of the brain that has control over the lust to blast things to smithereens. some of us gain control over it by the onset of puberty. some don't.
shelldrake: he said lust! quonsar: heh heh at 10:01 pm
giant light-emitting cephalopod captured
tokyo in ruins. uh, no, wait...
film at eleven.
posted by quonsar at 12:51 am
friday, nov 3, 2000
perpetual bubblewrap
the ultimate in time wasting
since you've got all this time on your hands, check out bill's underpants pong, rave dancers, and pants racing.
posted by quonsar at 10:13 pm
rectal foreign bodies
excuse me? did you say 'artillery shell'?
"the surgical management of two patients presenting with incarcerated, apparently self-inserted foreign bodies is reported. the large volume of prior literature on this subject is reviewed, with tabulation of 182 previous cases by type and number of objects recovered and with a discussion of patients' age distribution, history, complications and prognosis."
posted by quonsar at 9:27 pm
pork the one you love
well, if you insist...
the other white meat - shelldrake at 6:45 pm
male chastity tube
have a man you need to control?
"the 'male chastity tube' is a lightweight, safe and effective male chastity device that is made to lock behind the wearer's testicles and prohibit any touching of the member while installed."
isn't that special.
posted by quonsar at 6:34 pm
squirrels must die
sponsored by sdl: squirrel defamation league
"the sdl and any of its members do not condone violence and shall not be responsible under any circumstances for any illegal actions taken by readers of this page."
posted by quonsar at 6:29 pm
the smell of money
i don't need no steenkin' money belt
authorities called the amount "suspicious". apparently, the location isn't suspicious.
submitted by shelldrake at 6:15 pm
thursday, nov 2, 2000
all about my vagina
more than i wanted to know
"i keep putting off the story of my annual pelvic exam (which was a full month ago now)."
and that's just fine with us. really.
stirrups by shelldrake at 11:01 pm
desperately seeking female companion
hobbies: hopping, chewing green bushes, hopping
he's absolutely desperate to escape these guys. and i thought my cat was lewd...
submitted by shelldrake at 6:09 pm
election hoax aims to deceive voters
democrats told to go to the polls on wednesday
is anybody dumb enough to fall for this? well, judging by the the number of ludicrous virus hoaxes that get forwarded to me, the answer is yes. a lot of people are dumb enough to fall for this.
posted by quonsar at 5:34 pm
man and woman
an electronic comparison
posted by quonsar at 5:28 pm
wednesday, nov 1, 2000
dean and nigel blend in
people we have encountered and managed to blend in with
"of course in my day we never had blending in, all we had was a stick and a thick pair of glasses."
exhumed by shelldrake at 9:08 pm
meet the butte pirates
for excellence in school mascot choice
they'll try to tell you it's pronounced 'byoot'. don't you believe it.
disinterred by shelldrake at 8:41 pm
de' agony of de' feet
that's what i'd call soccer balls
drop kicked by shelldrake at 7:06 pm
dysfunctional self perception: case #4729
i'm such a pretty little girl
posted by quonsar at 6:47 pm
ask dr. laura
lesser and greater abominations
"when I burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, i know it creates a pleasing odor for the lord (lev. 1:9). the problem is my neighbors. they claim the odor is not pleasing to them."
posted by quonsar at 6:38 pm
real kangaroo scrotum only $14.95
imported from australia
with sack tanned and contents removed, they'll now hold your jewels...
posted by quonsar at 6:00 pm
you don't want to know
really you don't
posted by quonsar at 12:25 am
monday, oct 30, 2000
cat technology specialists
bringing cat technology to the common man
"hector lost all four of his legs in an automobile accident, and his body had taken too much damage to be able to adapt to new legs."
posted by quonsar at 9:08 pm
cleft® - keeping america's butt-crack dry
stops anal odors where they begin
now available in sport, fresh, musk, apple-cinnamon and pine scents...
posted by quonsar at 8:52 pm
north american farts
a guide to the identification and classification thereof
this site will allow you to distinguish the subtleties of such species as 'fizzle', 'squeegie' and 'playing misty'.
contributed by shelldrake at 8:40 pm