tampons of glory
"Let freedom flow with these specially-designed American Flag tampons. They're great for those times where protection is a must: baking apple pies, leading church activities, or walking down the beach at sunset with your daughter having one of "those talks". It's the most all-American thing any woman could ever use...period!"
yhbc at 10:17 pm
"All pregnancies arising as a result of participation in American Embryo are the sole property of ABC, Inc. and may be terminated at any time. All fetuses and adult participants are intended for entertainment purposes only and should not be considered as actual human beings."
shelldrake at 6:37 pm
thin ice
"We're on the banks of a FROZEN RIVER on a cold, sunny day. Trees along the riverside drip with melting snow. Far off toward the horizon, almost out of sight, an emaciated OLD WOMAN lies on the ice, moaning feebly for help. GEORGE W. BUSH stands before a WINNEBAGO and addresses the gathered CROWD. BUSH: Hey everybody! You remember that old woman who's been stranded on the ice these past 6 months, who we've been ignoring up until now? Today, I'm sending this Winnebago fulla Boy Scouts out there to RESCUE HER! THE CROWD roars and cheers: WOO! LET'S GO! WE'RE GONNA BE HEROES! LET'S SAVE THAT OLD LADY! One guy, a PROTESTER, speaks up: PROTESTER: Umm.. Mr. President... It's the middle of April... You think it might be unwise to drive a Winnebago onto the ice? THE CROWD snarls with disbelief: WOULD YOU LISTEN TO THIS GUY?! HE HATES THE BOY SCOUTS! HE HATES WINNEBAGOS! HE HATES GEORGE BUSH! HE WANTS THAT OLD WOMAN TO FREEZE TO DEATH ON THE ICE!"
quonsar at 4:28 pm
"We're on the banks of a FROZEN RIVER on a cold, sunny day. Trees along the riverside drip with melting snow. Far off toward the horizon, almost out of sight, an emaciated OLD WOMAN lies on the ice, moaning feebly for help. GEORGE W. BUSH stands before a WINNEBAGO and addresses the gathered CROWD. BUSH: Hey everybody! You remember that old woman who's been stranded on the ice these past 6 months, who we've been ignoring up until now? Today, I'm sending this Winnebago fulla Boy Scouts out there to RESCUE HER! THE CROWD roars and cheers: WOO! LET'S GO! WE'RE GONNA BE HEROES! LET'S SAVE THAT OLD LADY! One guy, a PROTESTER, speaks up: PROTESTER: Umm.. Mr. President... It's the middle of April... You think it might be unwise to drive a Winnebago onto the ice? THE CROWD snarls with disbelief: WOULD YOU LISTEN TO THIS GUY?! HE HATES THE BOY SCOUTS! HE HATES WINNEBAGOS! HE HATES GEORGE BUSH! HE WANTS THAT OLD WOMAN TO FREEZE TO DEATH ON THE ICE!"
quonsar at 4:28 pm
leoflyŽ incredible dog transport system
"From the plane to the train, while you shop or while you walk! With Leofly your dog is right by your side!"
madamjujujive at 8:19 pm
cute, innocent babies grow up to be ugly, hideous adults"This little mouth-breather is gonna grow up to change tires. His ass-crack will always be showing over the tops of his trousers and he will astound and amaze and revolt the lot of us with his ignorance."
madamjujujive at 7:59 pm
